Carers often forget to look after their own wellbeing as they are often too busy looking after others. If you are a carer then this event may help you to unwind & have a day away from caring.

I often help out at these events & find it very rewarding as a therapist. I'm looking forward to doing this one. I shall be there in the afternoon offering free hand massages. This is open to all & there's no charge for the event or the therapies on offer. Also, no need to book. See you there!

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5 steps to Wellbeing (or how I try to fit it in my busy life!)

Every day life seems to get busier & busier for me; especially with all my voluntary commitments. On top of that I also have a family to look after so how do I manage to look after my Wellbeing. As a therapist I realise that in order to care for others I must first of all care for myself.

I have just heard on the radio that recent research has shown that people who have a wide circle of connections are happier and more content than those who have fewer connections.

There is so much advice and information from the Government and health authorities to be fit, in body & mind, that it can be bewildering to know where to start. Well, this is how I try to fit in the advice given:-

• Be connected– connect with everyone around you. This can include family, friends, colleagues and neighbours. Spend time developing these relationships e.g. by a quick chat on the doorstep to having a long leisurely drink with a friend. Don’t forget that some strangers are just friends you haven’t made yet! I make a point of setting time aside for family/friends and try to make sure that I don’t let relationships drift. I go as far as arranging mutual times to call my adult children who live away from home. I also try to set slots aside in my diary to see friends or else things can easily drift. I make it a priority to stay in touch with my family and friends.

• Be active –This doesn’t have to be in a gym or cost any money. Just by taking a walk to the local shops/park can help your mental wellbeing without much effort. It is best to find an activity that you thoroughly enjoy and you can easily fit into your life. I try to walk whenever I can as the fresh air often helps me to clear my mind. A longish walks also makes sure that I am tired enough to have a good night’s sleep. Don’t let the wet & windy weather in the UK at the moment put you off as we’re ‘waterproof’ & there’s no such thing as bad weather - just bad clothing! So warm up & enjoy the day; below is me enjoying bird watching on a chilly day on the Norfolk coast.

• Be learning – learning any new skills can give you a sense of achievement. It can also build confidence and maybe a new set of friends or at least you will be in company of people who have similar interests. I joined a computer class run by the local Adult Education Service last year and more recently I have also joined a new photography group. Now I must get myself a SLR camera! These groups have opened up new learning areas for me and some have definitely challenged me! Any activity that involves mental activity is also good at keeping dementia at bay so keep those grey cells active.

• Be giving – The smallest random acts of kindness such as a smile, or taking note of someone’s outfit, a ‘thank you’ or a kind word can be so beneficial to your wellbeing. You may also like to think about volunteering with an organisation that you identify with. This will also help your mental wellbeing and help you build new friends and connections. I find my voluntary work with the Red Cross and other charitable organisations very rewarding and fulfilling.

• Be ‘Mindful’ – this is not mumbo jumbo or hippy dippy! It just means being more aware and appreciative of the present moment. These moments of calm away from your routine can help you to view any challenges more positively. I’m a ‘graduate’ of Mindfulness and find it a useful exercise to do before I see a client or have difficulties going to sleep – it works every time for me! Mindfulness also means being kind and compassionate to yourself and those around you. Many health authorities in the UK offer this training free so there is no excuse!

Wishing you all a happy, healthy & joyous New Year, may 2016 be a good one for you.

Being Mindful at 2 years old

Recently I had the honour & privilege of looking after a 2 year old. Her name's Molly. During our time together I learnt a lot about Mindfulness from her. The world of a 2 year old comprises of moments and how to take part and enjoy those moments occupies them totally as the picture below shows!

watching noisy lorries can be relaxing too!

Young Molly's actions embrace everything that I appreciate & understand as 'Mindfulness' . In its essence it includes taking note of what's around you, enjoying the simple things, standing & staring for the sake of it and appreciating the simple things in life. You don't need money for Mindfulness just the willingness to take the time out & note things.

enjoying the journey rather than rushing to get there!

Also, Mindfulness for me means enjoying the moment to its full & taking joy in the present rather than letting the past invade our thoughts & also not thinking too far ahead! To me it also means being curious & catching sight of everything around me & finding the beauty in everyday things & savouring the task at hand whatever they may be.

"Today is a gift, that is why it is called the Present".

exploring the equipment before baking

enoying the sensation of the water

appreciating things even when they don't make sense to you

taking opportunity to relax wherever you are

taking time out to stand & stare & noticing things 

So take time out & enjoy the sensations, sights & sounds around you like Molly does. You may like them!

MS & Massage

I recently had the privilege of working at the MS Therapy Centre in Norwich, NR6 6BB. The photos below shows the hand massages I gave the volunteers & some of their families:-

Getting ready for my day at the MS Centre

One of their wonderful volunteers having a hand massage

Multiple Sclerosis (MS) is a neurological condition & the diagram below clearly shows the damage that occurs in the myelin which is a protective sheath surrounding the nerve fibres of the Central Nervous System (CNS):-

As a result messages get scrambled & as there are no clear pathways this may affects movements. It can also result in poor mobility, pain & impaired cognitive abilities.

Women's Health Forum

One for the ladies! I'm so delighted to say that I've been invited to do an interactive talk & offer mini treatments at this event focusing on women's health this coming Sunday. 

Please come along & support. Venue in central Norwich, NR2 1SF, opposite the delightful Chapelfield Park.

Massage sessions de-mystified!

For those who have never had a massage before I'm often asked what its like! Well, that's a difficult question to answer as everyone responds differently to a session & each experience will be an unique one depending on what they are having, the experience of the therapist & what state the person treating is in. I'm also often asked do I have to undress completely? Well, the answer again is its up to you! Most clients undress down to their underwear but you can have all your clothes on & have what's called a 'seated clothed massage' as can be seen from the picture below:- 

Clothed seated massage by Bibi

Also, you don’t have to lie down on a massage couch if that's difficult for you to do. You can have a massage in almost any position: lying on your side, standing against a wall, on your stomach or on your back. Should a client choose to undress to their underwear then they are covered with towels & these are carefully moved as required to carry out the treatment. 

The other question that I'm often asked is: 'what happens during a session? Well,that depends on what treatment you have come for and the therapist you see! With my own practice there is always a full consultation so that
your medical history and lifestyle can be taken into consideration in the treatment plan. If you have come for a unclothed massage then you get changed in privacy and lie on the couch. I then start the treatment & will ask for feedback from you regarding the strokes & pressure etc. 

At the end we chat about the treatment and your aftercare is outlined. This is written down & given to you as a reminder. Also, I will advise about what you can do in-between treatments to maintain or improve your body’s equilibrium. This may be through gentle stretching exercises which I'll show you or changes to your lifestyle or diet may be discussed.

Upper back massage by Bibi

Shoulder & arm massage by Bibi

Leg massage by Bibi

Self-care for carers

'Self-care for carers' 

I've been thinking for some times what an amazing job carers do; some chose to do out of love, some out of friendship & some find themselves doing it by accident. I'm sure that there are very few people who would choose to do this almost 24 hour job without any timed breaks. This was brought home to me recently when I was talking to a carer at an interactive session I did on 'Stress Management & Relaxation'. He mentioned that he's the full time carer for his wife & he had to leave his job to do this. He says the most exhausting thing about looking after her is he never knows when he'll have his own time & finds it difficult to plan anything as his wife can be taken ill at any time. I've been thinking about the strain this must put on his health & wellbeing as well as the restrictions it must place on his social life.

To this end I've put these 5 self-help suggestions together to help those doing this very valuable job of caring:-

1. It is crucial for the sake of those you care for & also for yourself to take time out. This doesn't have to be for a long time, just a few minutes on your own EVERY DAY would be beneficial. During this time it'd be helpful if you had your eyes closed and listened to yourself breathing. Concentrate on the breathing & when you mind drifts away from your breathing then gently come back to this. Try & do this for at least 5 minutes.

2. When you are able to, listen to the music you used to like. Music helps to bring back memories & relaxes the mind. The person you are caring for may well like this activity too.

3. Don't forget to keep up with your social contacts. This may be difficult to do time wise but it doesn't have to be for long lengthy periods. Just dropping someone a note, which only takes a few minutes whether on-line or hand written, would be wonderful for the person receiving and also for you. You may think your friend/relative doesn't want to hear from you but the person may also be thinking that you're too busy to keep in touch. So go on & make the first move & see what happens.

4. Try not to snatch meals; if possible make an occasion of it by eating slowly & enjoying your food. Your digestive system would be grateful to you!

5. After having a shower/bath spend a little while spreading cream all over your body to refresh & calm yourself. A simple & gentle sweeping actions with your hands would help to relax the nerves. It is best to use a sensitive body lotion.

Hope these suggestions help. If you would like to add some more then please do & I'll post them too. Many thanks.

Bibi's Wellbeing 1st blog - welcome!

Hello & welcome to Bibi's Wellbeing blogs. 

This is my 1st blog so go gentle on this beginner! In my blogs I'll give advice, information & guidance to do with your wellbeing; especially 'relaxation & stress management'. This is an area that is of great interest to me & I have spent many years gaining the experience to deliver this to others. I'm a complementary massage therapist, specialising in helping ladies to take care of their mind, body & soul. I'm also a speaker, demonstrator & trainer on all things to do with your wellbeing.

I've been working in this field for many years and I am an ex-lecturer, mother & volunteer for many organisations. I'm well aware of the stresses & pressures of modern life.

Well, a little about myself now. I'm told that I had my first massage when I was a few minutes old to see if all was well! This is how things are done in a small rural village in rural India. No modern machines to help the midwife then! Since then I've found massages to be extremely helpful to relieve stress & calm me. I now consider it as a necessary part of my wellbeing rather than as a 'special' treat. 

I'm based in the historic & lovely city of Norwich, Norfolk.

A massage will help you to achieve inner calm & relax so please give me a call -  07717089280  -  to make an appointment & discuss your individual needs. 

As an added bonus there's £10 off your 1st appointment.

Massage - a delightful way to unwind & achieve inner calm